One year later...

On this day one year ago, I celebrated two things. One being my 31st birthday, and the second, the fact that I just found out I was going to have a baby! One year ago today, all I knew about Violet is that she was two pink lines on a pregnancy test. I wrote about that experience here.

Now, a year later, it's fun to look back and see all the things that have changed in my life, in me, in my marriage, in my faith. I remember the girl that took the pregnancy test that day, but she looks so different now. I wanted to reflect upon the differences that I notice the most:

1. My Time - my days are not filled with the same things as they were before my little darling arrived. Because Violet is such a mama's girl (i.e. likes to be attached to me in some form 98% of the day), I am not able to do everything I used to do. Would I like to have more "me" time? Yes. Would I like to be able to do a full workout, try new recipes, and knock out some DIY projects? Yes. But I know there will be a time for that later. When Violet has grown out of the needy stage, those things will all still be there. But I will never get back the time that my baby girl wanted me to snuggle her.

2. My Priorities - If I reach the end of the day with a healthy, happy baby (happy is a relative term), I consider the day a success. Caring for Violet comes automatically. I have had to make a conscious effort to keep my relationship with God and my husband alive and well since I am so focused on Violet's needs. I've also noticed it is easy to stay in your own little bubble of baby world; forgetting that there are other friends, extended family, and even people you haven't yet met that need my prayers, encouragement, and love. While my priority is my family, I frequently have to remind myself to step outside of my own world in order to grow.

3. The way I view my parents - Don't get me wrong. I have always loved my parents; they are two of the most amazing people I have ever met. But there is truly something indescribable about the love you feel for your child. It makes me so thankful that I had parents that love me the way I love Violet. They have supported and sacrificed for me in such a way that I didn't understand before I had a child of my own. I realize now why they protected me in ways that didn't make sense to me before. They made the world a safe, happy place for me. Sometimes I sit rocking Violet in her nursery, pleading with God for her salvation. I know my parents did the same for me, and I love them for it.

It has been the hardest year of my life, without a doubt. I am so thankful for my husband, who has shared all of the craziness. There is no one else I would rather be sharing this journey! I'm grateful for another year and excited about where it will take us.